Thursday, March 18, 2010

Avoidance

So, in my last post I talked about avoidance and my lack of connection with the warrior in me. I've been working on that a lot lately. I've changed up my pharmacological routine and it has really helped with my general energy level. I used to be so tired and groggy. I have noticed now that I have somewhat normal levels of alertness and energy my connection to my warrior has increased. I've got a lot more done at school, at work, around the house, in my relationships. It's really made a huge difference for me to be proactive in my relationships again. When I don't make the initiative, for whatever reason, I get discouraged about the lack of interaction I have. On the other hand, when I make that effort, I find much more meaningful connection with others. It's almost like what you get out of the relationship has something to do with what you put unto it. Who knew?

And then I looked at my blog. I have checked it darn near every week since my last post and each time had the thought, "I need to post something." And then I never do. I'm starting to get the feeling that I am avoiding blogging. The next question that comes up in my psychological mind is: Why? Well that's simple. I don't like writing about myself just to write about myself. Now, when I can convince myself that what I'm writing about can benefit someone else. . . . no problem. I can go on forever. (As you may have noticed from my previous posts.) But to write just because. . . .not so much.

I'm not sure this post will benefit anyone else. If you can't already tell, it hasn't flowed nearly as easily as my other posts. But I was determined not to give into the spirit of avoidance and just write something. And I think I've succeeded.

No comments: